Aslamu-Alaikum world, So decided to take one for the team and give a little brief history lesson so to speak on polygamy/polygyny. I promise it wont be boring LOL. Ok so I was talking with a friend (i hope she doesn't mind me posting this) recently she was sharing a story of what someone said to her regarding polygamy. She is also in the pre-phase of polygyny and someone told her in so many words that she either must have very low self esteem to consider polygamy or must be an angry black woman or Mormon.Huh? WTH? Hmmm really? When she told me this I really had to laugh so hard. For one, she is neither of these things, she isnt black, or Mormon or low self esteem. The sister is very pretty Mashallah. When people say really stupid things sometimes you have to ask yourself, what is wrong with them? Were they dropped one too many times as a baby? Did they spend their early days eating glue and or paint chips? Is their brain leaking? Or are they simply just on crack? All of these are likely answers to their obvious ignorance and stupidity. So for the people out there wandering the world thinking these are the only 3 possible scenarios for a woman to even consider it, let me enlighten you.
Basic definitions:
Polygamy is a marriage where one person has more than one spouse. Polyandry is a practice where a woman has more than one husband at the same time. (Which as we all know is haram, but who would want that anyway?) And Polygyny is when a man has more than one wife.
Because I'm feeling lazy here is an except from an polygamy article online from an reputable site (no not wikipedia lol)
Polygamy has been practiced by mankind for thousands of years.
Many of the ancient Israelites were polygamous, some having
hundreds of wives. King Solomon (peace be upon him) is said to
have had seven hundred wives and three hundred concubines.
David (Dawood) had ninety-nine and Jacob (Yacub, peace be upon
them both) had four. Advice given by some Jewish wise men state
that no man should marry more than four wives. No early society
put any restrictions on the number of wives or put any
conditions about how they were to be treated. Jesus was not
known to have spoken against polygamy. As recently as the
seventeenth century, polygamy was practiced and accepted by the
Christian Church. The Mormons (Church of Jesus Christ of Latter
Day Saints) has allowed and practiced polygamy in the United
States.
Polygamy is practiced today in nearly every country in the world. Wow
what a shocker nearly every race, and culture practice it...not just blacks
and Mormons lol. Some countries practice illegally like the U.S, other
countries such as Malaysia practice it openly.
People practice polygamy for various reasons. Although most wives first , second or third would all agree that they would prefer not to share the husband, they would likely also agree they would rather share a "good man" then have 100% of a loser. Let's face it, a lot of men suck. No I am not some angry bitter woman just stating facts. There are some slim pickens out there, not sure about men abroad only referring to Brothers around these parks. But just saying, people have issues this days. Before I married Hassan I turned down 9 YES NINE marriage offers. Ok so yes I am picky to some degree, but that's because I value myself and wasn't just going to settle for any loser that came around. There were so many reasons why I was attracted to my husband, he had/has a lot of the qualities that I was interested in. He's a good catch not even going to lie. So I can easily see why the concubine approached him. She probably was thinking to herself ," hmm he's pretty fly and is up on his deen handling his business, maybe I can be his second wife even thou I'll never come close to being as awesome as his first wife." LOL
Here in the U.S as well as abroad many women (many with children) are currently all sleeping with the same man whether or not they know it and yet he has no legal responsibility to them. In this country its ok for people to have open relationship and "share" STDs but oh no let people actually get some morals and want to marry each other and all hell breaks loose.Lol How many men have fathered umpteen number of children (unmarried) and are not contributing financially or otherwise to help these children be raised? Somehow this is more culturally acceptable? WTH?? lol At least polygamy gives the women some rights in the sense that the men are required to take care of them.
Ok, so back to my original point. The practice of polygamy isn't new. There are many benefits of practicing it for all parties involved if done right. And many women who are attractive and awesome, borderline amazing in every way practice it and are open to it. Yes, it is a struggle at times. All marriages are a struggle. Many people wanna give polygamy a bad name and say there are so many people not doing it right. Well there are so many people not doing monogamy right.The current divorce rate of
monogamous marriages in the United States is around 55% , Hmmm....so what we shouldn't practice monogamy either?
